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Sammy Edwards

"Wait! Where are you going?" Cin Student Just Started Talking About Oscars



It’s no secret that in 95 years the Academy often gets it wrong. Recent surprise picks like Parasite in 2020 restored some viewers’ faith in the Academy, however true cinema fans can’t forget that just one year before, they completely snubbed Sherlock Gnomes for Best Picture. Despite this unforgivable blunder, the Oscars still seem to hold a level of prestige and while it may not be signing a petition to free Roman Polanski, the Academy Awards are a close substitute for Hollywood’s elite to fellate each other. With the big night fast approaching, no one is more excited to insist their opinion on you than fourth year Cinema Studies major, Arthur Rooney.


Rooney recently found himself at a party and noticed local acquaintance, Tara McPherson on her phone. This left Rooney no choice but to segue into a conversation about the Oscars “Oh, you have a phone? You should add me on Letterboxd, let’s just say my reviews keep it real. Speaking of keeping it real, let’s talk Oscars, yeah?”


However, as Rooney began to denounce the Academy for merging Best Sound Mixing and Best Sound Editing into one category, McPherson somehow was tuning him out, “Oh shit, CP24’s on tonight? Sorry Armand, got to go.” McPherson said, making a beeline to the nearest exit. “Wait! Where are you going?” cried Rooney “We didn’t even touch upon the biggest snub of the night: Best Documentary Short Subject!”


While she didn’t hear Arthur Rooney’s dissertation on why auteur directors should include more closeups of women’s feet, Tara McPherson learned a more important lesson this Oscar season: like the Hollywood royalty they worship, Cinema Studies students are no strangers to thinking people care about what they have to say.

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