"The Connections I Get Here Will Totally Help Me Get a Job" Reports Fraternity Brother After Polishing Off 12th Bud Light


Toronto, ON: Future venture capitalist Chad Williamson, an ambitious member of one of the University of Toronto's fraternities, explained to a number of confused eighteen-year-olds that sporting his frat sweater, issuing vaguely homophobic comments, and "donating" free tequila shots to unsettled first-years will further his highly-anticipated career as a business leader. 


"Yeah, my frat brother Brad has a really good idea for a new type of Bitcoin. Once we get it up and running I'll finally be set to buy my own speed boat and a monster house in the Calgary 'burbs."

Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Please reload

The Boundary is the University of Toronto's Satire Paper