Lonely EX100 Janitor Bonds with Ghosts of Fallen GPAs

Toronto ON - Eugene Wong, a single, middle-aged janitor at the University of Toronto’s Exam Centre, was sweeping the floor of the main exam room when he found himself cheerily bantering with the ghosts of fallen GPAs.

 

“You’d be surprised at how much we have in common,” says Wong. “We’re both so sick of this place, for starters. Me because it’s a dreary place to work, the GPAs probably more so because it’s the site of their untimely demise.”

 

The litter of spectres and poltergeists, once a proud battalion of 4.0s and potential Rhodes scholars, also lamented to the janitor about their regret in not studying at Ryerson instead, Wong’s alma mater.

 

At press time the janitor was recommending a strict skin care routine of gently applied Lubriderm and daily vitamin-D supplements to combat the spirits’ pale, ghoulish complexions. “Just because your hopes and dreams are dead doesn’t mean you need to look the part,” Wong quipped. 

 

Photo credit: ACE Classroom Specification 

 

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The Boundary is the University of Toronto's Satire Paper