TA Caves, Gives A+ to First-Year After Being Lectured on Philosophical Nuances of Paper

PHL101 Teaching Assistant Thomas Dafoe knew he was in for a treat when first year Preston Brownlow pulled up in the dying minutes of Dafoe's Thursday afternoon office hours. 

 

"Frankly dissatisfied," with the meagre 74 he received on his paper entitled “Kant’s teleological and ontological mistake with regards to Hegel’s ethics on the supplications of man,” Brownlow made himself comfortable and began his inquisition.

 

 

 

 

 

Taking on a fierce Ben Shapiro-like aura, the 18-year-old from Collingwood, Ont. berated Dafoe for "failing to understand" the distinct, and quite honestly "groundbreaking" philosophical nuances of his midterm paper.

 

After 20 minutes of lecturing from Brownlow, something clicked, and Dafoe was suddenly hit with a realization: this paper did deserve an A+. In fact, it was probably the best 1,200-word essay he had ever read.

 

Dafoe burst into tears and immediately got on his knees, begging for Brownlow's forgiveness.

 

Basking in the light of Brownlow's intellectual greatness, Dafoe immediately changed the grade to a 100 and asked to become Preston’s understudy.

 

This first-year philosophy paper will surely shape virtually all of humanity's discussions for countless generations to come.

 

Thank you.

 

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The Boundary is the University of Toronto's Satire Paper