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"Maybe University Just Isn't for You," Advises First-Year to Struggling Registrar


With midterm season approaching, anxiety mounts amongst flash-card wielding first-years and Stein’s-mourning fourth-years alike. For the first (or 14th) time in their university careers, an ill-prepared undergrad will fail their exam, and even worse, they’ll consider transferring to Ryerson when they do. However, there’s one group at UofT more acutely affected by imposter syndrome than its high-strung students: registrars.

Victoria College’s “Most Improved” registrar, Ronda Wembledon, was uncertain about her career at the university following a disastrous scheduling error.

“157 students needed me to manually enroll them in specific classes, but I accidentally dropped all their courses and put them on permanent academic probation instead,” confessed the registrar. “I called my mum to calm me down. She just told me to be easy on myself and remember that coming of age is hard––especially when that age is 43.”

Although Wembledon’s mother takes the soft approach towards correcting her daughter’s Thanos-snap approach to scheduling, the students whose timetables evaporated are giving Wembledon some tough love.

“I told her outright, ‘Maybe university just isn’t for you,’” first-year Matt Anders says proudly. “There are other, less… rigorous… career paths that Wembledon can take, like being a registrar at an art school or a technical college. But she should really decide what she wants to do with her life while she’s still got the rest of her forties ahead of her.”

In hopes of gathering intel on Wembledon’s employment status, The Boundary’s investigative team reached out to the Victoria College Registrar Office. No answers have been determined, however, as her status is officially marked as “Not Yet Graded.”


Photo Credit: Sammy Edwards

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