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  • Nona Jalali

Student With Stockholm Syndrome Applies to Grad School

While UofT students are generally easing into their winter semester workload, many fourth-years are feeling an added layer of stress thanks to graduate school applications. Graduate school can certainly be a warranted pursuit, but psychologists wonder why exactly these fourth-years would subject themselves to another half-decade of school immediately after completing their degrees. Their findings? Fourth-year students applying to grad school all have diagnosable Stockholm Syndrome.

“I don’t know why else she would apply, to be honest,” says Elmira Vari about her best friend, Anya’s decision to apply to UofT’s Philosophy graduate program. “For four years, her whole personality has been railing against UofT. She’s been bitching to me non-stop about how useless philosophy is, and now her Instagram bio says she ‘Kant believe she found the perfect Nietzsche for herself in Toronto.’ What the fuck?”

While graduating students may seem clearly trapped by their academic safety net, the Stockholm-stricken students remain completely oblivious to their condition.

“I genuinely love UofT,” says fourth-year student Laura McPhereson, white-knuckling the three UofT Plush Animals her don forced her to buy from the bookstore.

For any soon-to-be-graduates figuring out their next step, The Boundary strongly recommends students screen themselves for Stockholm Syndrome through UofT’s new “UChecked Out of School” web portal.

Photo Credit: Emily Jin



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