College Registrar Asks Three Riddles at Bridge to Course Enrollment

VALLEY OF DOOM -- University contains a great many trials and tribulations. From slaying the dragon of exams to the long and arduous journey of the course essay, it takes skill, tenacity, and wit to succeed on the epic quest that comprises a university degree. Before they can challenge any of these myriad obstacles, however, students at the University of Toronto must first confront the first trial of the year: the fearsome college registrar.

Generally, confronting the college registrar is  an arduous task; gaining entrance into courses requires careful preparation, swift action the very moment that registration opens, and a healthy dose of luck. However, members of administration at the University decided that the previous difficulty was not a sufficient challenge for students, and have elected to recruit a new employee to increase the difficulty of course enrollment. 

Bert the Ogre now stands at the bridge to course enrollment, challenging any student who wishes to select their courses to a game of three riddles before they may proceed.

“We just thought that students today had it too easy,” said Allister MacNiel, an employee of the office of the registrar at University College, “Back in my day, we had to beat a troll in single combat, so we thought that this wasn’t too brutal. Now the troll only tries to eat you if you can’t answer the riddles.”

Such was the fate of one Medieval Studies student, Arthur Gruff, who had previously been most worried about not getting into FIN220. Prior to confronting the troll, Arthur is reported to have been quite confident about his chances, saying he’d read “all of the troll-lore he could need” over the course of his studies. 

Unfortunately, while Arthur did know that “thirty white horses on a red hill” was referring to teeth and that “a box without hinges, key, or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid,” was referring to an egg, he could not recall the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. At press time, Arthur’s bones had already been ground to make Bert’s bread.