Among other things, UofT is known for its wide range of course options. From Quantitative Reasoning for Political Science Majors to Quantitative Methods for Business Management, there’s almost no shortage of fun classes to choose from. A recent addition to the course catalogue, LAN169: Introduction to Love Language(s), was expected to be a hit. Taking famous Christian DILF Gary Chapman’s book on the five love languages as its textbook (available for $16.99 on Amazon or $56.99 at the UofT Bookstore), the class had over 200 students enrolled at the beginning of the semester.
The class appeared to start smoothly, with seemingly happy students streaming out of Professor Pederfilla’s lecture room. But between January 8th and February 2nd, over half of the class dropped the course. Today, the course has officially been cancelled by the department, which revealed that inappropriate conduct concerning physical touch had made the class an unsafe space.
“I’m not surprised they ended up cancelling the class,” said former student Bella Ankorage (she/her, words of affirmation, gift giving), “I feel like I learned a lot, but Pederfilla’s methods don’t work for everyone. I’m not physical touch dominant either.”
“Honestly, I don’t know where the department is coming from with this,” said Pederfilla, “I was teaching a course on love languages. Did they think I wouldn’t demonstrate?” The Professor continued, “I’m sorry that my love language is physical touch. But I shouldn’t have to be. One of the main issues we would cover in the class is the discrimination of people with other or ‘othered’ love languages.”
Though some expected the class’ cancellation to be accompanied by the firing of Pederfillia, those individuals clearly don’t understand the concept of tenure. It will be a long time until Pederfillia is removed from our campus.