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Jennifer Furman

Desperate Upper Year Student Secures Habitat in Queen’s Park


After an entire hour of last-minute searching, incoming third-year student Derek Geeter finally secured a socially-distant living space in one of the most popular U of T locations: Queen’s Park. 


According to Geeter, it became clear that Queen’s Park was an ideal location after he was waitlisted for campus residence, discovered he had no credit or renter’s history to get an apartment, and met Tartu’s cockroaches in person. To ensure his safety, Geeter decided to sleep atop King Edward VII’s statue horse, maintaining a generous distance of at least three metres from all human activity. 


Geeter had experienced life on residence before, but he was ready to move on from the unique trials and tribulations U of T housing had to offer. From successfully connecting to Lower Burwash’s shitty WiFi in first year, to squashing a record-setting 46 silverfish in Upper Burwash in second year, to most recently surviving a brain aneurysm after seeing the pricing for Campus One, it’s only right that he’s finally found his own little space on campus to call home.


When asked what he liked best about Queen’s Park, Geeter remarked, “the party culture is easily the best I’ve experienced while at UofT. I can’t even go three minutes without someone offering to light up a fatty with me.”


Photo Credit (Unedited): Marcus Obal


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