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  • Zainab Haider

Failing Student Blames Parents for not Playing Mozart in Womb

It's a well-known and proven fact that exposing a fetus to classical music, specifically Mozart, leads to increased intelligence and cognitive abilities. Many of history’s greatest minds listened to the stimulating sounds of Mozart's symphonies while in the womb. Thus, it comes at no obvious surprise that a Rotman student, who wishes to remain anonymous, feels that being denied Mozart during his nine months in utero is to blame for his academic shortcomings.

The second year deeply resents his parents for not helping him stay above the curve at university. To get both sides of the story, The Boundary followed up with the student’s parents, “we put him through the best private schools and the tutors! We even played relaxing nature sounds in the womb.”

Despite their best attempts, uncomplex melodies and academic support are no substitute for their prenatal negligence. Afterall, how could the sounds of a babbling brook ever help any student pass ECO204?

Victim to being denied the complex rhythms and melodies of Mozart’s Marriage of Figaro and Eine Kleine Nachtmusik have undeniably stunted this anonymous student’s success. The failing Rotman student further shared how he can, “never catch up to my Mozart-exposed peers. What’s the point of trying when I'm already starting out at a disadvantage?”



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