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Royal Family: "We're Not Racist, We've Given More African Countries Independence Than Anyone Else"



The Royal Family have been reeling since Harry and Meghan’s interview with Oprah last week. The couple accused the rest of the family of making Meghan feel like an outsider, of ignoring their pleas for help, and of making racist comments about their baby, Archie. UofT students, who are very familiar with institutions that do not provide adequate mental health support, are wondering how the Royal Family can afford the unicorn blood that keeps Prince Phillip alive, but not a counsellor or two.


In a statement released by Buckingham Palace, the Royal Family said they regret that Harry and Meghan felt isolated. “We reached out to them (at least once a year) to check in on them and to make sure they had enough food and water to sustain them,” the statement read.


The House of Windsor said they were “flabbergasted” with Meghan’s assertion that they were racists. “There is no family more steadfastly committed to helping African countries achieve independence,” the statement read. No mention was made of Britain’s role in colonizing the continent, though.


As the dust continues to settle from the interview, Her Majesty The Queen remarks that she is officially “too old for [her] family’s bullshit.” In an exclusive interview with The Boundary, she reveals that she believes multiple people in the family could have made racist comments, admitting that a Royal game of “Duck, Duck, Goose” will be underway to catch the perpetrator.


What is Her Royal Majesty’s biggest regret surrounding the historic event? “I can’t believe those two didn’t take me to L.A. with them.”


Photo Credit: IB Times

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