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  • Boundary Staff

UofT Scholarship Committee All Suspiciously Wearing New Mink Coats

The Boundary has confirmed reports that members of the UofT Scholarship Committee, whose job it is to review applications and award scholarships, have been sighted wearing brand-new mink coats valued at upwards of $5,000. There has been no known pay raise or bonus for the committee members, which raises questions surrounding the source of this sudden abundance of disposable income.

“Oh yeah, them’s are real minks alright,” says local Mafioso Tommy ‘Two-Fingers’ Bassanocelli, upon inspecting the photographs. “The rule is not to flash all your money at once. Rookie mistake.”

While The Boundary’s esteemed team of sleuths has yet to peg where this new money is coming from, Tommy Two-Fingers’ numerous suggestions indicate that something shady, like a bribe or a bank robbery, may be at hand.

The committee members themselves have declined to comment on their extravagant purchases, though they did release a joint statement specifying that they purchased the mink coats within store guidelines. Updates to come on what that means.

Photo Credit: Emory Claire Mitchell



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