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Man Desperate for Campus Brochure Feature Hospitalized after 36-Hour Frisbee Bender
Area student William Williams is in critical condition at St. Michael’s Hospital after a grueling, day-and-a-half frisbee marathon....
Boundary Staff
Sep 16, 2018


University of Toronto Colleges Ranked Alphabetically
Even after a decade of determining these rankings, this process never gets easier. While number one may be predictable, number six will...
Boundary Staff
Sep 13, 2018


In Huge Win for Residence Algorithm, Long-Lost Brothers Reunited in Double Room
After a decade of constant yet fruitless searching, two long-lost siblings were reunited in the most unlikely of settings: an empty...
Boundary Staff
Sep 12, 2018


Desperate English Majors Begin Making Animal Sacrifices to Northrop Frye Statue
Toronto, ON: A series of votive offerings -- including the midday slaughtering of over 800 lambs -- and other dedications have been left...
Boundary Staff
May 2, 2018


President-Elect Boucher Promises Bloody Purge, Improved Dental Plan
Toronto, ON: Anne Boucher, the newly-elected leader of the University of Toronto Students' Union (UTSU) held a celebratory press...
Boundary Staff
Apr 30, 2018


Future Fascist, War Criminal Takes Entire Group Study Room for Himself
Toronto, ON: Smug misanthrope Kevin McKelvey, a suspected perpetrator of crimes against humanity, casually annexed an entire fucking...
Boundary Staff
Apr 22, 2018
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