top of page
Prof Waits Until 12:10 a.m. to Celebrate New Year
Jameson, like clockwork, is always late for anything scheduled directly on the hour.
Natalie Cader-Beutel
Dec 31, 2020
Public Health Ontario Warns to Steer Clear of Suspected Super-Spreader
The man was traced as having illegally entered the country from the North Pole, based on hoof-prints left by his magical flying reindeer.
Joseph Strauss
Dec 24, 2020
Parents Secretly Relieved Drama Student Stranded for the Holidays
It’s been 525,600 minutes since the Wilson family has seen their favourite/only daughter.
Madeleine Beckett
Dec 23, 2020
First-Year Only Clears Search History When Elf on the Shelf Not Looking
Is she in the clear, or is she due for another year of fossil fuels hanging above the fireplace?
Daniel Golden
Dec 20, 2020
Cheating Student Makes Dean’s List, Naughty List
"I hope all you pathetic losers enjoy your coal!"
Patrick Fraser
Dec 10, 2020
Heart-Warming: COVID Denier Transforms Into Believer After I Sneeze On Them
"By Boy George, that same Reid Simmons who was once burning schoolyard children’s masks had magically transformed into a COVID believer..."
Sammy Edwards
Dec 6, 2020
bottom of page